06 June 2006

For Better or Worse

It's very postmodern and "cool" to talk about Christian theology as having to do with relationships. For whatever reason, it seems to be the thing to do these days.

While some of this may be the winds of current trendiness, there is something deeper there. At least I'm becoming convinced there is.

You see, the more I think about faith the more I think about it in terms of a relationship with God. One that is dynamic, messy, prone to high and lows, and which needs constant attention and work to be maintained. No human relationship exists without these characteristics...and I'm not sure that our lives with God are any different.

With regards to relationships, what I am currently pondering most is marriage: how two people--dissimilar in individuality yet united in commited love--covenant with God, each other, and gathered witnesses to share their lives together no matter the circumstances and no matter the cost.

We know the vows. Sickness. Health. Rich. Poor. Better. Worse. A man and a woman simply promising to be there one for another no matter what.

While we know that this picture of marriage often fars fall short of how it is practiced in our sadly broken world, it's a good model. So good that it reminds me of the way that we are supposed to exist as Christians. As the Church. In our respective churches.

Like man and wife, we choose to be in relationship with God and by extension His family. We exist with them together. Whether or not we always "like" being in this relationship is immaterial. Because of the commitments we have made to God we need to stick it out. Work through it. Remain connected.

Just as--because of their vows--no husband or wife ought to end a marriage over one argument, so too no Christian should leave a church behind because of a bad spell or season. It goes against what it means to be united in Christ. What it means to be in a relationship.

I tell this to a married friend of mine who has problems with the current state of his ecclesiastical experiences. I share it because I believe it...and because I know that only by persevering in commitment to each other and the vows made--spoken or simply understood--can real relationships ever prosper.

14 comments:

Unknown said...

Hi Josh.
What about a string of bad seasons? Is there a threshold beyond which it is unprofitable to remain?

Jesus, at least, lets you off the hook for adultery. Is there a spiritual equivalent?

I'm not asking for me, you understand. It's for a friend. [/wink]

miguelito said...

Josh,
I love the picture you’ve painted of a relationship with Christ as a marriage, a relationship, a stake in a spiritual family. I’ve also noticed that, in scripture, Jesus refers to the type of interaction we are supposed to have with God as a relationship. We “know” the “Father” and we “know” the “son.” The metaphors Jesus uses in parables are often sons, brides, grooms, masters and servants. These are all close, intimate relationships, that take love, respect, and commitment. On an encouraging note, and ‘cause I know you love the psalms, here’s the reward for ‘sticking it out.’


Psalm 91:14-16

14 "Because he loves me," says the LORD, "I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
15 He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him.
16 With long life will I satisfy him and show him my salvation."

miguelito said...

Dorsey,

These three remain, faith hope and love. The greatest might be love, but when we have a string of bad seasons and love gets hard to accomplish (as a verb) or see or feel (as a noun), then we have two other things we need to hold on to the other two as if they've all we've got left in the world (faith and hope)...cause they really just might be. Faith and hope are what give us a reason to keep holding on. Hope that there is a reward, that there is something after all this mess, and the Faith that God is going to come through. Once we can firmly throw our arms and hearts around this, it gets easier to love God again. Faith and Hope are what I think allowed Job to hold on to his love for God as long as he did, and they're what inspired Jacob to wrestle with God. So, when the going gets tough, hold on to these two, and don't be afraid to run towards God and wrestle if we need to, its much better, and I'd say more interesting, than turning around and walking away.

Unknown said...

Mike,

Um...I'm not sure you got the gist of my question. I'm not looking to get out of my relationship with God. My question (and Josh's post, I think) referred to "sticking it out" with your local church (lower case c, the organization, not the Church).

miguelito said...

well, I suppose that's cause I didn't know the question, but, I'm not really trying to answer any question at all really, just give a perspective. .

Unknown said...

Sorry. When you addressed me by name, I thought you were responding to my comment. My mistake.

Anonymous said...

Well, Josh, you're a minister, so you would have a different perspective... But I see no need to be "churched" to have a relationship with God. I can practice my relationship skills with people at my job, at the supermarket, on the highway. Churchy people have always seemed to be patting themselves on the back all the time for being churchy people and being all tightlippy about any less committed persons than themselves.

I don't WANT to have a relationship with people who act that way!

Unknown said...

Anonymous,

I have felt that way too. But I've also found that condemning self-righteous people is a catch-22, because it tends to make me self-righteous regarding self-righteousness. Y'know what I mean?

I think that's part of what Jesus meant by the narrow path. It's all to easy, in trying to avoid stepping off the left side of the path, to step off the right.

Anonymous said...

Dorsey ~ Thank you for your insight with this comment, "I think that's part of what Jesus meant by the narrow path. It's all too easy, in trying to avoid stepping off the left side of the path, to step off the right."

As an "unchurched" person who is still searching because of some of the reasons that "anonymous" mentions,your words help me to view things with a bit more understanding.

Josh ~ I read your entries regularly. You make me think, even if I don't always agree. I thank you for that.

Anonymous said...

Yup, dorsey, I do know what you mean. It is, indeed, a catch-22. I'm not condemning the churched among us; but just as a marriage cannot remain intact if one person gives all and the other takes all, so it is with a church and the churched.

Anonymous said...

Uh. Josh?
You there?

Josh said...

Dorsey,

I don't know if there is a threshold beyond which it is unprofitable to remain the church. I really don't.

Maybe this is one of our great lessons in life...learning to live with people who we are called to love but don't like at all.

Josh said...

Dorsey,

If you're talking about the local church, maybe there is a point...but that's a momentous decision to take.

I'm hesitant when I hear so many unhappy with the local church and then being unwilling to give their all to throw themselves into it, being faithful to God and not minding what comes of it.

Can one leave the local church. Ya. Is it a grave decision never to be taken lightly? You bet.

Josh said...

Anonymous,

There is an old Catholic statement to this effect:

"Outside of the Church there is no salvation."

Pretty harsh to our modern ears...and I'll be honest I don't entirely agree with it.

But what I do agree with is the importance that it places on the Church and, I think, by extension our local congregations. Makes me stop for a minute and worry a little more.

Can you have a relationship with God without including others? Ya, I guess. But it's not going to have the richness that comes out of fellowship, the fire that comes out of disagreement, and the comaraderie that comes from sharing faith together....even amongst those with whom we have nothing else in common.

Jerry Fallwell, William Sloane Coffin, John Paul II, Martin Luther King, Jr.

All children of one King in a way that is hard to understand, but true.